Rhubarb 2019

ST EDWARD’S r h u b a r b

41

OSE Obituaries

BAILES – On 8th December 2018, Thomas Henry Bailes (C, 1994-1999), aged 37, peacefully at Sobell House Hospice, Oxford. Brother to Neil (C, 1992-1997), John (G, 1998- 2003) and Joe (G, 2003-2008). Tom’s friends, Alexander Jessey (C, 1994-1999), Mark Wingfield Digby (C, 1994-1999), Jalal Geilani (F, 1994-1999) and Giles Brooke-Hollidge (C, 1994-1999) have kindly sent the following tribute: On match days, Tom’s unrelenting efforts and his policy of ‘the bigger they are, the harder they are to be hit’ had the nerves of some parents jangling - mainly the opposition’s. His peers, however, empowered with youth cheered with abandon. Tom was known for being fearless, throwing himself heart and soul (and head) to stop the opposition, but of course there was more to Tom than his rugby. His toughness on the pitch was matched by a reserved and thoughtful demeanour off it. His friends knew him for his sense of humour, stylish character and adventurous nature but his skills in the classroom were evident too. Work hard, play hard, tackle hard seemed to have been his motto. These values he carried into adulthood, taking pleasure from all sorts of things including sport and music, art and religion. He enjoyed spending time with friends putting the world to rights. His high regard of the individual and determination to see the good in everyone meant he often showed others a pragmatic way forward. This, along with his understated disposition and generous manner inspired many who knew him, from his oldest friends all the way to the nurses in the hospice.

Tom was born on 12th May 1981 in Oxford. He attended St Hugh’s Prep School, making a name for himself as both a talented rugby player and loyal friend - something he was known for throughout his life. Jalal, having just immigrated to the country remembers the first day at that new school was particularly daunting. Tom, in his usual way, reached out and offered support to someone who was struggling to find his feet. It was the tonic needed and a friendship was formed for life. Winning the Rotherfield Exhibition from St Hugh’s, Tom joined St Edward’s in 1994, where he continued to prove himself on the rugby pitch, starting at scrum-half for the Shells B team. His tackling scalps, defence and all-round competitiveness meant the selectors could not ignore him and it was not long before he was promoted. A strong player, he jostled for top spot with other standout players throughout the years, finishing at scrum-half for the 2nd XV. Tom was mentioned at various times in the Chronicle , including in the 1998 edition. D S Wippell, Coach for the 3rd XV, wrote: ‘Tom Bailes was, in my opinion, the best player this season - he is an excellent scrum-half, with all the skills for that position and a real flair for the game and an obvious enjoyment of it.’ Off the pitch, Tom focused on the Humanities earning himself A Levels in Religious Studies, Geography and History. Following St Edward’s he continued writing, often solely for pleasure. His words gave expression to his reflective nature and right up to the end he kept showing us the value of this. He wrote: ‘We all die, but unlike you I know it will be quite soon.’ This humility and respect for the inevitable were maintained

with the same resilience he showed on the rugby pitch. Tom had earlier contended with mental illness during his time at St Edward’s but it had remained hidden from view. In the following years he took on the fight and with help from others he worked his way out from this difficult place. He was succeeding. He had enrolled with The Open University to study again. He was well on his way to completing his degree in History with a 2:1 but had to put his studies on hold once diagnosed with cancer. Tom prepared himself for this new fight with the same courage he showed throughout his life. The cancer, however, was too advanced and eventually Tom passed away at Sobell House Hospice, Oxford, with his parents and brothers Neil, John and Joe at his side. His funeral was held at St Peter’s, Wolvercote, on 18th December, attended by family and friends including Rev Andrew Wright, Bjorn Bowles (B, 1992-1997), Craig Drummond (E, 2003-2008), James Pearson (C, 1992-1997), Mark Potts (E, 1993-1998), Richard Potts (E, 1995-2000), Mark Wingfield Digby, Alexander Jessey and, in spirit, Giles Brooke-Hollidge and Jalal Geilani who kept vigil throughout the service from their respective homes in New posthumously awarded Tom a Diploma of Higher Education in recognition of his hard work and capability. Those who knew Tom will treasure the time spent with him and remember him for his toughness on and off the playing field, his quiet determination to meet all the challenges he faced, his reflectiveness of mind, humour and down-to-earth attitude. He is dearly missed. Zealand and Saudi Arabia. The Open University have

V A L E T E O B I T U A R I E S

Thomas Henry Bailes

BAINBRIGGE – On 12th November 2018, Angus Bainbrigge (D, 1951–1956). Son of Roger (B, 1923-1926). Angus’ long-term partner, Sheila, and his stepdaughter, Marie, have kindly provided the following obituary: Born in Chelsea, London on 28th April 1938, Angus Bainbrigge attended St Edward’s during the 1950s. His father, Roger Bainbrigge, also attended the school before him, during the 1920s. Sadly, Roger lost his life in Egypt in February 1943 during the Second World War when Angus was aged four. Angus also tragically lost his mother to pneumonia a year later and spent the remainder of his childhood with various distant relatives when not at boarding school. At St Edward’s, Angus was a valued member of the rugby team and he donated several books to the school after he left. He always spoke fondly of Teddies and had many precious memories of his time there. His contemporary, Tom Blair, remembers how Angus used to read stories to the other boys in the dormitory, to keep their spirits up when they were homesick. Angus went on to study for a degree in Spanish at Trinity College Dublin, after which he taught Mathematics and